Where am I going?
Where to begin?
How to begin?
Each question begets more questions.
My wife is a sex addict!
This is not a theory, but a fact as she went through intensive almost two month inpatient program to initiate recovery. After 15 years of marriage and two wonderful children, it makes me sad.
Your first question I know is: Am I still married to her? Yes I am. Sometimes that makes me sad too. Because had I known what I know as truth today (and only "officially" discovered after she committed to recovery and sexual sobriety,) I won't be. How pathetic I feel that I did not trust my gut instincts and all the signs and get out before seemingly losing my dignity too.
Here are the stats:
- 3 Years
- 3 Facebook Accounts
- 5 Email Addresses
- 7 Extra-marital Physical Affairs (All unprotected) "Qualifiers"
- 8 Extra-marital Emotional Affairs that never got intimate
- $150,000 in medical bills
- Countless fractured friendships
Could it have been much worse? You betcha. The "good news" is that she is clean of STDs (F-ing amazing) and she did not get pregnant.
The hurt and pain for me, the betrayed husband, are never-ending.
Did I let this happen to me? Unquestionably Yes. I have many, many regrets. But I also know my wife, who is in her mid 40s, is solely responsible and accountable for her actions.
Today, she is attempting to fix herself and so far, so good.
Am I a co-addict? A Co-dependent? A Victim? An Enabler? A Rescuer? A Private Detective? Who knows? I'm probably all the above, if not more. What I know for sure is that I have remained monogamous, loyal and honored my marriage vows.
I also have found strength to commit and support her recovery as well as mine. I've discovered a new found fortitude to not comprise my morals and ethics anymore. It maybe unorthodox as you will find out but it feels right to me.
My kids remain my priority, with myself second and my marriage a distant third.
So my wife maybe off the merry-go-round of sex addiction, but follow me on the never-ending roller coaster of recovery and read stories of how her sex addiction has turned my life upside down.
pics?
ReplyDeleteor it didn't happen
ReplyDeleteThis blog isn't good without pics
ReplyDeleteWhat is this, I don't even
ReplyDeletedude how do you know the kids are yours?? You think she'll tell you they arent? n put up more stuff dude.. writing is therapeutic
ReplyDeleteMy brother recommended I might like this blog. He was totally right. This post actually made my day. You cann’t imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!
ReplyDeleteSex can be fun and it can be unemotional but when you are in a committed relationship, sex is immensely emotional and something that bonds you. Nothing is more betraying than finding out that your partner experienced that physical connection with someone else just because they think u are not too good at it. In my viewpoint there are No excuses when it comes to cheating.In my own case,my man was an ingrate who gets off on sleeping with other women despite being in a good relationship where i provided almost everything,he cheats and lie to my face each time i confront him.But all thanks to ''hackingloop6@ gmail . com'' for their investigative and hacking service that helped me hack and gain remote access to all his phone activities and exposed all he was doing behind me,both text messages,dating sites and phone calls.Our relationship is strained and lack the physical connection we craved for.You can contact hackingloop6@gmail .com' also on WhatsApp +1(484)540 - 0785, if your partner's commitment is in doubt.
ReplyDelete